This story will cover Reason I Love BJJ #4.
Today during open mat I had the chance to roll with one of my favorite instructors. It was extremely fun and a good reminder of why I like to go to open mat. After I finally had to stop and rest, he said that I did a good job of staying calm, and that he likes to force lower belts to match his pace and I did just that.
I really appreciated the compliment. I feel calm when I roll, at least 80% of the time. I can do better then 80% and I'll work on that, but the level of calm that I feel when I'm rolling is amazing.
Here's my deal. I get bored easily. There aren't many things out there that can focus my mind completely. Until I found BJJ, engineering problems came the closest. I could sit and try and solve a problem for hours. Unfortunately, working out in corporate America was usually not as challenging as my homework was during my undergrad experience. Ever since I graduated college I've been sitting on too many spare moments to think.
I can't be trusted to think of productive things in this situation. End of story. Instead I'll think about how I could've done something better or how I failed in some way. Insecurity manifested. Without a problem to focus on, I waste energy on maintaining a near-constant level of anxiety.
Then I started rolling. Nothing focuses the mind like trying to survive. Trying to recall the techniques needed to escape and avoid being submitted (not to mention planning for some kind of offense, should the opportunity present itself) leaves no room for insecurity. Why wouldn't I be calm?